I've abandoned my blog for a few months now. Probably people are wondering how's life going on or how are things going or wth am i. I guess all i have to say is i've been busy trying so hard to earn money but still struggling to survive through each month. How i really wish a miracle can happen and just grant me my wish of having a proper fulltime job. Please.

Apart from my failed job search for a few months now, life isnt that great anymore. I cant feel but to feel sad, depresssed and all of the other negative feelings. Cant seem to find that positive side in life anymore. Everybody leaves but only family stays. I guess thats the only thing that keeps me going and makes me happy now.

I really miss my girls. It had been a really really really long time since i last saw them. It feels like its ancient years ago since i last had a good quality time with them. But i cant blame anyone can i? The only person i can blame is just myself. Im the one who didnt make time. Im the one who just disappeared just like that.

Apart from that, things with him isnt really going on well either. I feel more like just a friend than a girlfriend. I never did feel special. As the days goes on, the more i see him as just a friend, a bestfriend. For 2 years plus im waiting for him to bring me out on a real date. 2 years plusssss! But still none. For how much longer must i wait for him to be a boyfriend material? Ahhhh, i dont think i should reveal too much. Thats not only it.

I really just feel so stressed, depressed and even more depressed right now. =''''(