Hey.

Super random feeling to blog. But im not any good with words anyway. All i can say is things arent really going on well. Things probably arent turning out the way i expected them to. But what else can i do? Just suck it all up and pretend that im okay, that this is all okay. Life is never fair.

Work, relationships with everyone and all other shitty stuffs is really taking a toll on my body. If only its possible, i really do want a short getaway with people i missed, like probably my girls, to get away from all this shitty shit. 

Im still new to answering calls at work but im already having the feelings of resigning. Work is getting too stressed. I am getting too stressed. Work, go out and no rest. And there are some motherfucker callers who think i do not have any feelings by the way they demand things from me, by the way they talk to me. Mind you people, we do have feelings too okay. We're trying our best to help you but what do we get in return? Just getting scoldings and unnecessary comments from you fuckedup callers? Do you think that is fair? Oh wait. I forgot, life is never fair. In just my 2 months plus in this job, i already had 2 complaints. When it is clearly isnt even my fault. I know it should dampened my spirits but it already did. The thought of going to work, answering bullshit calls from all these fuckedup people is already killing me. The 12 hours really felt so damn super long. 12 hours of having to sit glued to the screen, to the headset. 

Idk how much longer i can hang on to this job. But i need a job to support mysef, to pay off my school fees. I think i should have postponed my studies to next year. Money is forever not enough. The moment im having cash, i need to save them up for something. And i cant even use that bit of money for myself. Sighhhhhh.

And relationships wise, they are not doing ang good either. Im barely talking to anyone at home. The house just feels like a hotel room. My girls, i havent seen them in months. Everybody been busy with their stuffs, work and school. Guess all of this is part of growing up isnt it? The feelings of getting over an ex, having someone new and ahhh whatever shit else. Maybe i just need time alone, on my own. I dont even know what im doing. Somethings just dont feel so right. Idk what but sighhhh. =(